Save 20% Off Our Scary Thoughts Workshop With Code SCARY20
REGISTER & SAVE HERE
Save 20% Off Our Scary Thoughts Workshop With Code SCARY20
REGISTER & SAVE HERE

February 20, 2024

June 1, 2022

Battling Sensory Overload as a Mom: Drowning Out the Noise Takes More Than Just Earplugs

E:
123
with
Larissa Geleris
Occupational Therapist

What You'll Learn

  • Why Noise Is So Triggering
  • How Auditory Information Works With Our Sensory System
  • The Internal Factors that Play Into Sensory Overload as a Mom
  • How to Manage Situations Where Noise is Particularly Triggering
  • Why It’s Important To Build Regulation Skills

Sensory overload as a mom is difficult to manage. In a house full of chaos and noise, it’s easy to become overstimulated. But why does this happen? What causes it in our bodies? And what can we do to keep calm and drown out the noise? 

To answer these questions, I welcomed occupational therapist Larissa Geleris, WarriorOT, back to the podcast. In episode 73 Larissa shared tips for coping with overstimulation in motherhood. Today she’s back to talk specifically about how noise triggers us and what we can do about it.

Sometimes I Just Can’t Handle the Noise

The Ninja Training Camp in my house often looks (and sounds) like chaos. There are times when I love it—the sounds of the boys giggling and having fun while they run around, climb, and play. 

Other times, though, the noise level starts to get under my skin. It reaches a point where I have to shut it out or run the risk of entering Rage Mom Mode.

The noise level starts to get under my skin.

This sensation is something I often hear from clients as well. The noise can feel smothering, overwhelming, and even painful. It triggers stress, irritation, and Mom Rage

From a therapist standpoint, I understand why this happens—we’re at capacity for dealing with stimulation, due to too many tasks, anxiety, sleep deprivation, and simply a lack of being able to spend time alone to reset. 

But in my conversation with Larissa, I wanted to dive into the OT side of things to understand more of the auditory science behind overstimulation. 

Why Noise Is So Triggering

At the most basic level, noise is triggering because your auditory system is meant to be triggered by it. We receive input from sound, which then triggers a reaction in our bodies.

But sometimes, noises that shouldn’t be threats do trigger us. Noise can be triggering to anyone, but it’s very common for moms to experience sensory overload. Larissa shared that there are a variety of reasons why noise can cause more of a reaction in some people than others. 

There are a handful of auditory disorders that could play a role. Hyperacusis (experiencing sound as extra loud), misophonia (a strong aversion toward certain sounds, often related to anxiety or OCD), and phonophobia (fear of sound) can contribute to being triggered by noise. 

But even in the absence of auditory disorders, our sensory systems can be more primed toward defense as a default response to sound. This can happen because of trauma, neurodivergence, or genetics. 

For many moms, however, the biggest reason why noise is triggering is that our role is to protect our children, and our nervous systems are primed for that. 

Ultimately, when we get triggered by noise it’s because our system is primed toward defense. 

How Auditory Information Works With Our Sensory System

Our auditory systems are just one part of our sensory system. They work closely with two other systems—vestibular and visual. The vestibular system is responsible for sending signals to our muscles to move. The visual system helps us make sense of what we see. 

So, in our sensory system, a visual or auditory cue might cause a reaction in the vestibular system. These three systems work together to give us an understanding of our environment. 

We process auditory through two modes—discriminatory (which lets us tell sounds apart) and evaluative (the protective mode). In evaluative mode, a response is often triggered. We either feel the need to move toward a sound (like when our baby cries) or to move away (like if we hear a car behind us as we’re jogging). 

When our sound input matches what the body is expecting to hear, we can tune sound out more easily—it won’t always trigger a response. But when there is a mismatch, we are more likely to be triggered. 

When there is a mismatch, we are more likely to be triggered.

Ideally, the goal is to be able to adapt but not stay in the dysregulated, triggered state. For example, moving to our baby to soothe them without remaining in a state of anxiety. 

But sometimes our bodies find it harder to regulate, perceiving non-threatening sounds as dangerous and worthy of a response. This puts us into fight-or-flight mode and makes it harder to tune out noise. 

The Internal Factors that Play Into Sensory Overload as a Mom

The noise itself isn’t the only factor at play in overstimulation. While the sound inputs do trigger our defense modes, there are internal factors that make us more primed to react. 

The time of day can impact how moms react to noise. Moms often feel more overstimulated by the evening. All day, they have had to react over and over, dealing with ongoing demands and body responses. 

When that happens, our system thinks that we are in danger mode and stays in a state of muscular tension, which primes us for more defense. This creates a cycle that’s hard to break out of. 

Transition times are also often triggering for moms—we’re dealing with a lot of sounds and attempting multiple tasks, making it harder to stay regulated. 

Stress due to time crunches or worries can also make us more primed for defense mode. As Larissa pointed out, when we’re stressed, we’re already halfway to fight-or-flight mode. Sound input can easily push us all the way there.

When we’re stressed, we’re already halfway to fight-or-flight mode.

Certain days of the week can also be triggering. Weekends, when the routine is different, are often stressful for some moms. Other moms might find themselves experiencing sensory overload more on Thursday or Friday after a tiring week. 

Everybody’s defense mode is different, so it’s important to pay attention to your own triggers. (For me, bathtime is a big trigger. The noise and echoing at the end of the day is overwhelming, so I usually wear earplugs to help manage the sensory overload). 

As you go through your day, notice your own moments of stress and overstimulation. When do you feel most prone to sensory overload? Is there a time of day or a day of the week that is particularly hard? 

The more that we understand our own triggers, the better we can manage our responses. 

How to Manage Situations Where Noise is Particularly Triggering

Once we start to notice our triggers, we can work to build resilience toward the noises that bother us the most. 

One of the first steps is to start taking notice of our entire sensory system in those moments. There are likely also visual and vestibular inputs contributing to the stress—like balls flying through the air, constant picking up and putting down the baby, or clutter and mess around us. 

As we take note of all of the cues, we can start to pick them apart. Larissa recommends grounding yourself when you start to feel overstimulated. Try identifying:

  • 5 things you can see
  • 4 things you can touch
  • 3 things you can hear
  • 2 things you can smell
  • And 1 thing you can taste

This can help you make sense of what’s happening around you and calm your senses. 

Larissa also recommends acknowledging and validating your feelings. Being aware of your triggers, piercing through them, and finding some order in the chaos, can go a long way in helping us stay regulated.

Being aware of your triggers can go a long way in helping us stay regulated.

Giving your body stability can also help manage overstimulation. Larissa likes to sit down on the floor with her back against the wall when she finds herself experiencing sensory overload. By stabilizing the vestibular system, you can reduce some of the defense response. 

We can also try to reduce low-frequency sounds (like the air conditioner or the stove vent) and high-frequency sounds (like loud toys) when we start to feel overwhelmed. Low-frequency sounds tell our bodies that a threat is nearby—pushing us to move away from them, while high-frequency sounds send distress signals that draw us to move toward them. Those sounds can be particularly triggering. 

Mid-range frequency sounds like human voices or white noise can be soothing, drawing us in for connection. Since different people have different perceptions, however, it’s important to explore sounds and discover what feels soothing to us. Then, we can consider implementing them in certain situations, like when we’re working or resting. 

Why It’s Important To Build Regulation Skills

Larissa believes that it’s very important to build skills to help manage ourselves as we move into overstimulation. 

We can teach our kids some skills to help—such as taking turns or holding onto a thought when talking so they aren’t all trying to speak at once—but our focus should be on our own regulation. 

We can teach our kids some skills to help, but our focus should be on our own regulation.

But because there are so many noises that we can’t control, we need to develop the skills within ourselves. 

Larissa also explained that tools like noise-cancelling earplugs are fine when used judiciously. But when we remove a sensation we become more sensitive to it. That means that if we use earplugs regularly, we’re going to need to continue to use them. She recommends using them sparingly for particularly difficult times. 

Other ways to build regulation skills include progressive muscle relaxation, breath work, stretching, yoga, or going for a walk. If you can, build time in your schedule to do some of these before you enter into predictably stressful times. 

As Larissa said, we can’t eliminate noise. Children are going to be noisy—and they should be! But we can manage ourselves and give ourselves more capacity to deal with it. Most importantly, we can take care of ourselves in the chaos, and be forgiving toward our own sensitivities. 

We’re all going to lose our cool sometimes. But with the right tools for repair, we can preserve the bond with our children and model lifelong skills for resolving conflict. Register for our FREE masterclass and learn our 3-step method for repair!

NEWSLETTER

Subscribe to our newsletter and stay updated.
Thank you! Your submission has been received!
Oops! Something went wrong while submitting the form.
Tags:

Sensory overload as a mom

Stage:

Postpartum, Motherhood

Share Now:

OUR GUEST

Larissa Geleris
Occupational Therapist

Larissa Geleris, MS, OTR/L is an occupational therapist and a mother of two. She has extensive training and clinical experience in the identification and treatment of sensory processing disorder. After becoming a mother, she realized how truly overstimulating parenthood could be, and started applying her clinical knowledge to her personal roles. Larissa's latest passion is creating online resources to support all parents in understanding their own sensory triggers and validate their sensory experiences within the role of parenthood.

Erica Djossa
Erica Djossa
PMH-C | Founder of Momwell
Erica is the founder of Momwell, providing educational resources and virtual therapy for moms. She is a mom of three boys and a registered psychotherapist. Erica’s work has been featured in the Toronto Star, Breakfast Television, Scary Mommy, Medium, Pop Sugar, and Romper. how they want it.
RELATED ARTICLES
October 30, 2024
October 30, 2024
A New Approach to Developing Secure Attachment
E:
249
with
Dr. Ann Kelley
Co-founder of Therapist Uncensored
October 21, 2024
October 16, 2024
The Stressed-Out Mom: Why Maternal Stress Matters and How to Create Support
E:
247
with
Dr. Molly Dickens
Founder of The Maternal Stress Project
October 7, 2024
October 2, 2024
How to Get Paid During Maternity Leave in the US: Understanding Rights, Policies, and Options
E:
245
with
Daphne Delvaux
Founder of Delvaux Law and the Mamattorney
October 2, 2024
September 25, 2024
The Importance of Emotional Learning as a Mom: Breaking Cycles and Building Confidence
E:
244
with
Kelly Oriard & Callie Christensen
Co-Founders of Slumberkins
October 15, 2024
September 11, 2024
Navigating Stress and Relationship Conflict as Parents: How to Work as a Team After Having Kids
E:
242
with
Liz Earnshaw
Family and Marriage Therapist
October 7, 2024
September 4, 2024
Raising Securely Attached Kids: How to Foster Connection and Build a Lasting Bond
E:
241
with
Eli Harwood
Licensed Therapist and Author
September 4, 2024
July 31, 2024
Approaching Infant Feeding with Flexibility: What We Can Learn from the Data on Combination Feeding
E:
236
with
Sarah O'Leary and Andrea Ippolito
CEO of Willow and CEO & Founder of SimpliFed
September 4, 2024
July 24, 2024
Emotional Regulation Skills for Moms: Why Motherhood Causes Dysregulation and How to Regain Some Control
E:
235
with
Dr. Amber Thornton
Clinical Psychologist and host of Know & Grow Podcast
August 19, 2024
July 10, 2024
How Intensive Mothering Creates Overwhelmed Moms: The Pressures of Modern Motherhood
E:
233
with
Jess Grose
Opinion Writer for The New York Times and Author
August 6, 2024
June 19, 2024
Navigating Culture and Mental Health in Motherhood: Traditions, Boundaries, and Carving Out Your Own Path
E:
230
with
Sahaj Kaur Kohli
Founder of Brown Girl Therapy and Author
August 6, 2024
April 24, 2024
Understanding and Implementing Responsive Parenting: How to Break the Yelling/Shame Cycle
E:
222
with
Dr. Cindy Hovington
Founder of Curious Neuron
August 6, 2024
April 17, 2024
How to Maintain Friendships (and Make Friends) as a Mom
E:
221
with
Danielle Bayard Jackson
Author
August 6, 2024
April 10, 2024
How Stressed Moms Can Cope: Understanding and Breaking Out of the Stress Cycle
E:
220
with
Amelia Nagoski
Co-author of Burnout
August 6, 2024
March 20, 2024
How Partners Can Share in the Invisible Load and Reduce Mental Labour for Moms
E:
217
with
Zach Watson
Content Creator and Invisible Labor Educator for Men
July 3, 2024
February 28, 2024
How to Embrace Career Change as a Mom: Finding Your Passion and Overcoming Guilt
E:
214
with
Jess Galica
Career and Leadership Coach, Best-Selling Author
July 3, 2024
February 14, 2024
Rekindling Your Sex Life After Baby: Communication Is Key
E:
212
with
Vanessa & Xander Marin
bestselling authors & hosts of the podcast Pillow Talks
July 3, 2024
January 31, 2024
Postpartum Rage vs. Parental Anger: How Social Expectations Create Overwhelmed Moms
E:
210
with
Dr. Ashurina Ream
Founder and CEO of Psyched Mommy, licensed clinical psychologist
July 3, 2024
January 24, 2024
You’re Not an Angry Mom: Why We Experience Mom Rage (and What We Can Learn From It)
E:
209
with
Minna Dubin
Author of Mom Rage: The Everyday Crisis of Modern Motherhood
July 3, 2024
January 17, 2024
What Causes Mommy Brain? The Role of the Invisible Load on Forgetfulness and Brain Fog
E:
208
with
Dr. Jodi Pawluski
neuroscientist, psychotherapist and author
February 20, 2024
December 6, 2023
Navigating Different Sex Drives in Parenthood: What Impacts Libido and How to Reconnect
E:
202
with
Dr. Lauren Fogel Mersy & Dr. Jennifer Vencill
Licensed Psychologists and Authors
February 20, 2024
November 29, 2023
Prioritizing the Invisible Load of Motherhood: Valuing Our Own Time and Letting Go of Mental Labor
E:
201
with
Whitney Casares
Founder and CEO of Modern Mommy Doc
February 20, 2024
November 22, 2023
Erica’s Husband Reflects on Sharing the Invisible Load
E:
200
with
Frenel Djossa
Erica’s Husband & Co-Founder of Momwell
February 20, 2024
November 15, 2023
Breaking Generational Trauma Cycles: Healing Our Past and Moving Forward in Motherhood
E:
199
with
Dr. Mariel Buqué
Psychologist and the author of the book Break the Cycle: A Guide to Healing Intergenerational Trauma
February 20, 2024
November 8, 2023
Is There Such a Thing as Healthy Perfectionism? Reframing the Concept of “Perfect” in Motherhood
E:
198
with
Katherine Morgan Schafler
Psychotherapist and author
February 20, 2024
November 1, 2023
Breaking Out of the Default Parent Role: How to Communicate with Your Partner and Change Patterns
E:
197
with
Erin & Stephen Mitchell
Founders of Couples Counseling for Parents
February 20, 2024
October 18, 2023
Rebuilding Connection and Intimacy After Baby: How Family Systems Can Help Us Navigate Relationship Challenges
E:
195
with
Aaron Steinberg
Co-Founder of Babyproofing Your Relationship
February 20, 2024
October 11, 2023
Embracing the 7 Types of Rest: Why Moms Are Exhausted and What Actually Helps
E:
194
with
Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith
Board-Certified internal medicine physician and award-winning author
February 20, 2024
October 4, 2023
Interpreting Newborn Hunger Cues and Sleepy Signs: How to Learn Your Baby’s Needs
E:
193
with
Sharon Mazel
Author of Bite-Sized Parenting: Your Baby’s First Year
February 20, 2024
September 27, 2023
Understanding Overfunctioning in Relationships: How to Change Dynamics After Baby
E:
192
with
Dr. Tracy Dalgleish
Clinical Psychologist and Relationship Expert
February 20, 2024
September 20, 2023
Managing Mom Anxiety: Why Millennial Moms Are So Anxious and How to Overcome Our Fears
E:
191
with
Dr. Lauren Cook
Licensed Clinical Psychologist
February 20, 2024
September 13, 2023
Embracing Power as Moms: Reshaping Dynamics In and Out of the Home
E:
190
with
Claire Shipman
NYT Bestselling Author
February 20, 2024
September 6, 2023
How to Raise Confident Kids: Breaking Cycles of Negative Self-Esteem
E:
189
with
Dr. Vanessa Lapointe
Founder of The North Star Developmental Clinic
February 20, 2024
August 23, 2023
Understanding Sensory Self-Care: How Overstimulated Moms Can Regulate and Regain Calm
E:
187
with
Holly Peretz
Pediatric Occupational Therapist
February 20, 2024
August 16, 2023
Navigating Matrescence: The Roller Coaster of Becoming a Mom
E:
186
with
Dr. Catherine Birndorf
Co-Founder and Medical Director of The Motherhood Center of New York
February 20, 2024
July 26, 2023
The Journey of a Bereaved Parent: Stefania Thomson’s Story of Navigating Grief and Loss
E:
183
with
Stefania Thomson
Bereavement and Grief Advocate
February 20, 2024
June 21, 2023
Myths About Toddler Behavior: How to Reclaim the "Terrible Twos"
E:
178
with
Dr. Cathryn Tobin
Pediatrician
February 20, 2024
June 14, 2023
The Invisible Load of Fatherhood: How Dads Can Challenge Gender Norms and Become More Involved
E:
177
with
Dr. Singley
Psychologist and Director of The Center for Men’s Excellence
February 20, 2024
March 29, 2023
Birth Trauma Part 2: Facing Pregnancy After a Traumatic Birth
E:
166
with
Kayleigh Summers
Clinical Social Worker
February 20, 2024
March 22, 2023
Birth Trauma Part 1: How Birth Trauma Impacts Our Family Decision Making
E:
165
with
Kayleigh Summers
Clinical Social Worker
February 20, 2024
March 15, 2023
Real Self-Care for Moms: Why Mindset Matters More Than Massages
E:
164
with
Dr. Pooja Lakshmin
Psychiatrist
February 20, 2024
February 22, 2023
Navigating Working Mom Struggles: How to Let Go of Norms, Expectations, and Guilt
E:
161
with
Mary Beth Somich
Mental Health Counselor
February 20, 2024
February 8, 2023
Overcoming Mom Guilt: Rewriting the Motherhood Contract and Charting Your Own Path
E:
159
with
Libby Ward
Founder of Diary of an Honest Mom
February 20, 2024
December 28, 2022
Coping During Postpartum with No Family Support: When Reality Clashes with Expectations
E:
153
with
Emmalee Bierly and Jennifer Chaiken
Founders of ShrinkChicks
February 20, 2024
December 14, 2022
Navigating Career and Motherhood: Approaching Maternity Leave with Confidence
E:
151
with
Allison Venditti
Founder of Moms at Work
February 20, 2024
November 23, 2022
The Mental Load of Motherhood: How to Address the Imbalance of Household Labour
E:
148
with
Gemma Hartley
Journalist and Author
February 20, 2024
November 16, 2022
Surviving the Baby Witching Hour: How to Cope With Colicky and Fussy Babies
E:
147
with
Dr. Whitney Casares
Pediatrician
February 20, 2024
November 2, 2022
How To Deal With Toxic Positivity As a Mom: What To Do When Someone Invalidates Your Feelings
E:
145
with
Whitney Goodman
Marriage and Family Therapist
February 20, 2024
October 19, 2022
Returning to Work After Maternity Leave: Navigating the Emotions, Difficulties, and Challenges
E:
143
with
Dr. Cassidy Freitas
Marriage and Family Therapist
February 20, 2024
October 12, 2022
How to Know if You Have Postpartum Anxiety: Red Flags to Watch for in Pregnancy, Birth, and After Baby
E:
142
with
Dr. Sarah Oreck
Reproductive Psychiatrist
February 20, 2024
October 5, 2022
Protecting Maternal Sleep: The Relationship Between Sleep Deprivation and Postpartum Depression
E:
141
with
Dr. Nicole Leistikow
Reproductive Psychiatrist and Psychotherapist
February 20, 2024
September 21, 2022
Encouraging Independent Play: Why Unstructured Play Matters and How to Foster It
E:
139
with
Susie Allison
Founder of Busy Toddler
February 20, 2024
September 14, 2022
Dividing Labour Fairly in the Home: Redistributing the Mental Load of Motherhood
E:
138
with
Dr. Darcy Lockman
Author and Psychologist
April 25, 2024
August 31, 2022
Why Does a Messy House Give Me Anxiety? How to Stress Less About Cleaning and Keep Your House Functioning
E:
136
with
KC Davis
@domesticblisters on TikTok and Founder of Struggle Care
February 20, 2024
August 3, 2022
Overcoming Postpartum Depression and Anxiety: Why Support Matters and How to Find Resources to Help
E:
132
with
Dr. Wendy Davis
Executive Director of PSI
February 20, 2024
July 27, 2022
Overcoming Working Mom Guilt: Why Moms Should Never Be Ashamed to Be Ambitious
E:
131
with
Lara Bazelon
Law Professor and Author